Devil's Kitchen Comment

The less sweary writings of The Devil's Kitchen

Thursday, December 14, 2006

I'd buy that for a dollar!

The poor, little Greek boy has noted that there are some fucking stupid Christmas charity auctions around, and suggests that you dig deep into your pockets for another worthy cause.
I hereby announce the launch of the Eugenides Christmas Appeal 2006. Bids in the comments, please, for a quite awesome prize - the exclusive services of Mr Eugenides for an entire evening. One lucky winner will be able to watch me drink heavily all day (alcohol not included in price of bid), eat a kebab, lecture you on the evils of socialism, and then have an invited friend or family member called a "cunt" in all manner of daring and humorous ways until I fall asleep on your sofa.

If you're thinking that such an evening sounds horrendous, you're probably right. But let's remember that somewhere out there is someone who paid two and a half grand to have a curry with Yasmin Alibhai-Brown, and I bet you'll have a better time than they did.

Perhaps I should offer something similar...?


At 9:13 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Guvnah,

Right, I'll have some of that. He can babysit the nipper, chew his ears off for a change while me and the Governess bugger off out for the first night in a pub since the little bugger was born. Say £25?


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